Throughout this time I have been constantly reminded of my own mortality. Yup, a complete and total bummer! I prefer to believe that I will live for an unusually long amount of time. But the reality is that I don't even know what tomorrow holds. I'm not sure that it is healthy or even advisable for someone to think about death as much as I have lately, but it certainly has encouraged me to reevaluate my own life.
Two funerals ago I started thinking about what I wanted more of in my life. (Yes, it is indeed strange that I am marking time according to funerals. Please don't judge me. There is no "normal" when it comes to grief.) Thinking about what I want more of naturally led me to also consider what I want less of in my life. Since last week I have been obsessing thinking about this a lot. What do I want to have more of or less of in each new day I am given?
More walking
What? Were you expecting something a little deeper? I have been thinking about more walking because God has been really dealing with me about taking care of my heart- physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Walking will help me with this. As I exercise my body, I also get to process everything else that is going on in my world. It relieves stress and helps me refocus.
More gratitude
I am so much happier when I choose to focus on what I do have instead of what I don't. A thankful heart is a joy-filled heart.
More doing what I enjoy
Being a grownup often means doing lots of things that I don't really want to do. I can't do much about that, but I can fill the remaining time with lots of things that I do like. Things that energize me. Like gardening, reading, writing, knitting, going on coffee dates, mentoring, having dance parties... you know, fun stuff!
More peace
"Peace is a Person, not a place." This is one of my favorite quotes from Christian author Ann Voskamp. If I want more peace, then I need to spend more time with the Prince of Peace. Time with Him is never wasted.
Less anxiety
I spent much of 2014 worrying about stuff that never happened. I come from several generations of worriers. It is in my DNA. However, Dr. Caroline Leaf's research has proven that when you change your thoughts, you literally change your DNA. So I'm going to make some changes.
Less clutter
I thought that this would improve with both of my children out of the house. Sadly, it has not. I've got some organizing to do. Less clutter= less stress
Less making excuses
Over the years I have learned how to rationalize pretty much everything. Great short term strategy, but devastating in the long run. It is time for a new mantra, "No more excuses! Embrace it!"
Less selfishness
I've been thinking a lot about what my legacy will be. What will they say about me when I'm gone? What will be listed as my contributions to the world? If I'm going to leave a legacy of love, then selfishness has got to go. Easier said than done, but I'm working on it.
Less death
I know, I know, I can't control this in the most literal sense. But I can control my own choices. I can choose to embrace this beautiful life with all of its challenges and redeem the time I have been given. "Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live"! ~Deuteronomy 30:19 NLT
There it is. My manifesto of sorts. Are there things you want more of or less of in your life? What will you choose?
